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Video: Macklemore & Ryan Lewis –“Can’t Hold Us”

April 18, 2013, 1:02 am
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Seth Green look-alike Macklemore, known to his friends back at Evergreen State College as Ben Haggerty, bounces and raises his arms like the ceiling is too low for his ego in the long-awaited video for “Can’t Hold Us.” There really should be some sort of background check you have to pass in order to become a rapper. […]
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Beyonce’s Weave Attacked at Serbian Concert

April 22, 2013, 1:00 am
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Beyonce was pushed and shoved like a Croat prison bitch in Belgrade, Serbia on April 15 at Kombank Arena. (The exact place she debuted those wonderful golden sandcastle nipples.) Fans, if you want to call them that, grabbed at her weave, ping-ponging her between the aisles in a scary moment captured by a concert bystander. Bey’s bodyguard […]
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Rihanna Calls a Toddler her ‘N*gga,’ Goes Topless on Instagram for the Trillionth Time

April 23, 2013, 3:01 pm
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A small portion of Rihanna’s fans became upset after their blunty Bajan queen referred to a young boy as her “lil’ nigga” over the 4/20 weekend. I’ve never minded the use of the word by black men or women. I also don’t care if Jewish Americans or members of the Hispanic community make fun of […]
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Video: David Guetta “Play Hard” Feat. Akon & Ne-Yo

April 27, 2013, 2:50 pm
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Akon commands that you scrub and mop the floor with your ass (the kids are calling it “Twerking”) in David Guetta’s “Play Hard,” which also seems to incorporate some form of Harlem Shake. And don’t forget the ”Gangnam Style” rodeo and popsicle-licking, unibrow-having beauty queen. (A very long time ago, Fatboy Slim was the only person on the […]
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Rihanna Trolls Instagram User Who Trolled Her

May 5, 2013, 3:11 pm
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Rihanna‘s a badass, right? Like, she has a tiny gun tattooed under her armpit and she sings about being “so hard” and shooting men. Rum pum pum pum eh eh oh oh? One of the many people who forgot she was a gangster with a Penguin-style umbrella arsenal called her family members “retarded” on Instagram. […]
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Chris Brown Says Rihanna Is Too Young For Him

May 6, 2013, 3:14 pm
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Chris Brown told The Kyle and Jackie O radio show in Australia that him and Rihanna are not dating at this current moment in time. Speaking of time, he explained that one of the reasons they don’t work as a couple has to do with age. Brown, one year YOUNGER than Rihanna, 25, said this: At the […]
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Video: Theophilus London –“Rio” Feat. Menahan Street Band

May 9, 2013, 1:01 am
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Theophilus London parties it up in a cloud of smoke and women in the visual accompaniment for his new single “Rio.” Expect a new album from him (one of my favorite hip-hop artists of today) later this year. His last full length album, Timez Are Weird These Days (2011), and two mixtapes featured collaborations with artists like Solange, A$AP […]
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E! Says Beyonce is, Like, Pregnant Again, For Sure

May 17, 2013, 2:03 pm
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E! News’ “most read” article today is, unsurprisingly, one confirming that Beyonce is pregnant with her second child. This means she’ll pop out a beautiful baby (likely the subject of her next HBO special) named Green Violet sometime next winter. (Hard to be excited for her when SOME people are having their breasts and ovaries removed.) […]
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Nicki Minaj Settles DJ Beef, Explains How She Was Conditioned To Breathe Fire on Naysayers

May 28, 2013, 3:30 pm
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I generally feel the same way about Nicki Minaj that I do about Katy Perry. I’m a pop junkie, so I like some of their songs but not their personas. (Or excuse me, Nicki Minaj’s persona and Katy Perry’s personality.) My feelings for Minaj’s Cash Money bro Drake go the other way. (His rapping hasn’t […]
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Video: Major Lazer –“Bubble Butt” Feat. Bruno Mars & 2 Chainz

May 28, 2013, 11:38 pm
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I want you to sit and imagine the audition process for this video while you’re humming “bubble bubble bubble butt,” and then I want you to put your mixing skills to use and mesh this up with “Dance A$$” by Big Sean. Repeat after me, “Yo butt cheeks are so big, even Moses couldn’t part them.” Now think about […]
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Yeezus Honeymoon Period Ends as Critics Suddenly Remember Kanye West is a Terrible Person

June 23, 2013, 7:32 pm
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It’s been an exciting week for America’s favorite douchebag Kanye West, with the release of not only his Kardashian lovechild North, but also his much anticipated new album Yeezus, which “leaked” last week to overwhelmingly positive reviews. I mean shit, even the snobby assholes over at Pitchfork gave the album a 9.5 and slapped it with a […]
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I Look More Like Beyonce than Beyonce on Flaunt Magazine

July 11, 2013, 3:25 pm
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Beyonce chatted up Flaunt Magazine about Pepsi and pizza and posed for some futuristic photos that just look absolutely nothing like her. Tyra Banks maybe, or Vivica A. Fox, but Bey? No. Anything to do with Pepsi and aliens gets me thinking and (laughing) about that amazing Lana Del Rey drag queen parody. (“I guess you could […]
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Frank Ocean Lays the Lyrical Smack Down on Chris Brown

July 25, 2013, 6:15 pm
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Slightly tired of people writing songs about Chris Brown being an asshole instead of hitting him so hard that his teeth and tattoos fall off, but I guess Frank Ocean’s remix of “Versace” by Migos will have to do. You all remember when Chris got into Frank’s face over a parking spot then Frank won a Grammy and […]
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Michelle Obama to Appear in Health-Conscious Hip Hop Videos

August 14, 2013, 12:15 pm
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A slightly misleading but still incredible NME article says “US First Lady Michelle Obama to release hip-hop album.” Don’t get your hopes up too high, internet… Mich O. won’t actually be singing on said album, she’s just organizing it for educational purposes. You know her deal, getting kids to replace delicious fried food with food […]
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Terry Crews Plays Major Lazer in “Scare Me” Video

August 21, 2013, 12:14 pm
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Terry Crews has just completed the most important role of his film career. At least in my opinion. And the opinion of any Major Lazer fan. The NFL player-turned-actor appears in the trio’s new video for “Scare Me,” off their new album released earlier this year, playing none other than the Major himself. In the […]
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North West Has Kim’s Eyes and Kanye’s Look of Disgust

August 23, 2013, 10:18 am
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Kanye West revealed the first straight-on photo of his daughter, North West. No offense whatsoever, but the kid is really living up that androgynous male name. Babies are genderless to me anyway. And by genderless I mean invisible. And by invisible I mean I want one but I’d ruin its life. You know what they […]
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Miley Cyrus Horrified at the VMAs Last Night

August 26, 2013, 12:01 pm
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Everyone’s talking about Miley Cyrus’ “shocking” performance at the MTV Video Music Awards. Honestly the most horrible thing about it besides her looking like one of those street kids from the 90s who either sucks dicks for five cents or looks like they do as a fashion statement, was the fact that Robin Thicke agreed […]
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Mariah Carey Shares Popular Opinion That Nick Cannon’s Music is a Joke

August 27, 2013, 9:23 pm
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Mariah Carey‘s first born Nick Cannon told reporters at a VMA after-party that his wifey for lifey doesn’t take his music seriously. “She thinks my music is a big joke,” he said, laughing (because people laugh when things are true). “But so do I so it doesn’t matter … My music is silly, you know what […]
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Olivia Wilde Comments on Twerking

August 30, 2013, 8:55 pm
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You know how I feel about twerking. It’s awesome when the one woman goes to Wal-Mart and makes a “twerking by the cakes” video, but if anyone ever says that Miley killed at the VMAs, they’d be referring to the death of the twerk. Cat eye Drinking Buddies vixen Olivia Wilde had this to say during […]
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The Woman Who Had Her Butt Grabbed by Robin Thicke Thinks You’re All Being a Bit Dramatic

September 2, 2013, 1:38 pm
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Robin Thicke caused a big stink when a photo of him posing with a socialite at a VMA party with his hand totally on her butt surfaced. Honestly I do think it is more common for a dude to put his palm on a woman’s back or shoulder when posing for a photo, but it’s […]
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